I Disgust Myself
June 29, 2008
I had intented to spend most of my weekend, my precious time off from my traditional J.O.B., devoted to writing the novel I recently started. While I am in love with my plot and my characters, and I have a good grasp of their internal and external conflicts, I have been sidetracked in a big way by . . . blogs. There, I said it. Blogs have possessed me. I just discovered them, just began my own, and I never knew how much of a distraction writing and reading them would be. I’m like a 16-year-old with the family’s new car: all gassed up and driving in circles.
I disgust myself.
Afterall, I am a writer. I want to be a full-time author engaged in bestsellers, getting paid the big bucks for my devotion to and excellence at my craft. I want to take trips to New York to visit with my agent and the Hollywood peeps about the movie options for all of my stories. I want to call all my friends at their day jobs and lament that they can’t join me for a full afternoon of goofing off — because I can and they can’t. Instead I’m obsessing over blog stats and who’s looking at the puny posts from my various (okay, six) blogs. Oh, I disgust myself.
Why can’t I wake up in the morning and dash to my secretaries chair, flip on my computer screen with giddy gusto, and cannonball right into my next paragraph, picking up on creative flow right where I left off? I have such good intentions, such lofty ambitions. Yet my lazy streak enfolds me in its indolence and forces conformity right out my ass, just like the day’s BM: gratifying, but slightly malodorous.
See now why I disgust me?
Entry Filed under: humor, writers, writing, writing life. Tags: blogs, humor, life, writers, writers life, writing.
8 Comments Add your own
Leave a Comment
Some HTML allowed:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <pre> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>
Trackback this post | Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed
1.
thejinx | July 5, 2008 at 7:51 am
I understand too well how you feel. It’s so easy to be distracted by these things. I think a friend of mine has the right idea – write on a computer that does not have internet access.
2.
KJ | July 5, 2008 at 11:54 am
That’s a great idea, Jinx. Ah, if only I had the self-discipline . . .
3.
Winter | July 6, 2008 at 1:39 pm
LOL. I know what you mean. Here’s why I come back to my blog before writing “seriously”:
1. Exposed to too many stories about people making $$ with their blog.
2. There are no editors and I’m instantly published. So good for the ego, even if no one reads it.
3. It is as demanding as a pet lizard. Water it, toss in live bugs and you’re done.
4. it works on multiple levels – you can put in pictures, other links. There is no plot so you can just do what you want. And you don’t have to be perfect. Authentic works fine.
Hmmm. Back to my blog.
er, novel.
4.
KJ | July 7, 2008 at 8:33 pm
And the instant gratification ain’t bad either!
5.
John Shore | July 7, 2008 at 11:49 pm
I meet a fair number of aspiring writers. For what it’s worth, I usually suggest they take very seriously this question: Why, really, do you want to be a writer? What’s your real goal there? What do you think’s really in it for you?”
Always good to have that kind of clarity, I think. If you think you want to be a writer, but you’re NOT writing, then that means some fairly significant part of you DOESN’T want to be a writer. There’s probably some information there.
6.
KJ | July 8, 2008 at 12:45 pm
Good food for thought, John. One thing I’m clear on is that I do definitely want to be a writer. There were times (years) when I wrote everyday, and even finished a second book, enjoying every bit of the work involved. when I didn’t write, I felt like something was off. Now I think I’m in a “discouraged” patch, and after LOTS of life changes and three home relocations, trying to find a new rhythm that works for this stage and this place in my life is key to being the writer I want to be.
7.
dianegallant | July 23, 2008 at 11:34 am
I know what you mean! Here I am, reading these addicting blogs until noon and not writing a word today at all! I’m so ashamed!
8.
1writeway | July 26, 2008 at 4:35 pm
Dear KJ, you are a writer. No “want to be” about it.